Monday, March 30, 2015


Added a second med for bipolar. I would like it to work, so I can stop crying for absolutely no reason at all. Also was told by the doc that I need to spend time outside every day. Guess I better get used to lathering on all that sunscreen,

Thursday, March 12, 2015


Apparently I am bipolar with a depressive tendency. So more meds, yay! Or not. But if it helps I guess I will continue taking them. I never see any of the upswings in mood, I only ever see the downswings. But I guess the people around me can see them both. I have been on the meds for a week and a half or so and I don't know if I see any kind of difference yet, but we will see. I just want to feel...right again. I haven't felt right in 5 years. Sad is a mainstay, even if I disguise it as happy. It's not jut about missing the angels I miss either. Though I do miss them more than I ever thought was possible.

So, fingers crossed the meds bring my real smile back, so I can put my fake one away.